Let’s talk about love. If you read my post on role models, you will have heard me discuss my 12th grade sociology teacher and how he taught us many great lessons on being analytical people. One of them involves the concept of love. For the most part, in a classroom setting, we have a mental script and expectation of completing assignments, reading, or picking up wherever the previous lessons left off, but this day was different. We just talked. How does this relate to love, you may ask, well I’ll explain that.
For about 30 minutes, we simply had an open discussion about everything and anything that came up: movies, pop culture, politics, sports, we talked about it all. And then he cut us off and asked us a simple question; “What was the link that connected all the topics spoken about for the past 30 minutes?” A few people ventured a guess, but were all wrong. The reality of it was that he verbally said that he loved all of the topics that were brought up, and nobody picked up on it. In the end, he made a point of showing how the word love has diminished in meaning from being overused and misused. If the word is used in the same context of affirming ones devotion to another person as it is in the context of just a fondness for something or another, then does it really carry any meaning? And how are we supposed to discern in what manner it is being used. It just becomes a word people throw around willy nilly, and that’s not cool. From here, I could get into a great discussion about how we should find a new word to describe the concept of what we define as love, but do we even know what love is?
Some believe it is finding for your “Other Half,” or is it the ideology that opposites attract? Do you believe in love at first sight, or is it a developmental process? One could also take the scientific notion that love is just series of feel-good chemicals keeping two people together. The point is that there are all sorts of different positions to take with the idea of love. Personally, I don’t think opposites attract. We are people not magnets and cannot be simplified quite that easily. If any analogy is to fit, I think love is more like a morphing puzzle and we are the pieces.
Throughout our lives we’re constantly going from person to person seeing where we fit in. Sometimes we think we’ve found a good fit, but then it turns out that it didn’t work after all and other times we find a fit that lasts a lifetime. Often times we feel lost and almost like a missing piece that will never connect with anybody, but neglect to realize that we’re all a part of the same grand puzzle. Even if you don’t completely connect with someone, there are many different facets to personality that I believe anybody has the potential to fit with. It’s just that we tend to try fitting to the wrong sides of people and think that it can’t work. There are limitless possibilities out there, but what happens when you do think you made a great connection with someone?
When you find a match, you come together to create a small image of what ends up being a much larger picture. Also, it’s important to keep in mind that while you have found the sides of each other that fit well, you will both have sides that fit better with other people. Connecting with other people will allow you to grow in different ways. Like I said earlier, love is a “morphing” puzzle, so the people you surround yourself with will alter the way you fit and connect with others. That said, it makes sense sometimes you won’t have that perfect fit anymore with people you used to connect with so easily, and that’s okay. You can either work to establish what was once there through the art of communication and compromise, or you can start looking for new connections with other people.
In the end, there is no right or wrong answer to what love is, but it comes down to a unique and distinct connection between two likeminded individuals. When you come together, you accept each other for your differences while focusing on your similarities. When you are apart you remain intact, but when you are together you become a singular entity bringing out the best in each other while bridging a gap between different social groups. Much like two connecting pieces, when something happens to one piece the entirety of the puzzle has been compromised. Loving someone is not ownership and cannot be so easily obtained by the application of a label. It is an extension of oneself that creates something new and special. No matter how you like to conceptualize it, love is and will always be just a concept unique to the perceiver. However you like to think about it, it is and will continue to be a puzzling concept like any other.
What do you think about love and how would you define it? Like I said with my opening sentence, lets talk about love. I’m interested in what other people think.
Stay tuned and peace out